Reflections

It’s only been a day and a half since I reached home. I’ve been catching up with Paul, resting my feet, and very slowly starting to unpack my pack and put things away.

Starting to unpack

It’s good to be back to the comforts of home. Already normal life is returning, but my TA hike seems to be quickly fading. It’s hard to believe now that I was on the road for almost a month. Getting on that Intercity bus to Kaitaia seems so long ago.

I’m glad I have this blog to look back over, and remind me what I did. Thank you to everyone who was interested in following my journey. I read every comment, and it was incredibly helpful to know that people were thinking of me and cheering me on. 

I’ve been reflecting on the last month, and what I got out of it. Paul asked me yesterday, was there joy? It’s a good question. Here are some of my highlights.

The start. I remember looking down the coast from Cape Reinga at the unknown, and beginning my first steps, not knowing what was out there or how I would cope.

The scenery. The views south from Cape Reinga. Wading upstream in the Puketi Forest. Walking around the Mangawhai Heads cliffs. Kayaking down the Puhoi river. 

The challenge. Making it down 90 Mile Beach. Reaching the Raetea forest summit. Continuing to hobble on when I had injured shins and sore feet. Managing to Ford the Okura river. Reaching home.

My thoughts. I felt very isolated and alone - in the entire trip, I met almost no other TA walkers; and I only spent 45 minutes walking in the company of others (thanks to Greg, Darian and Frank on Ruakaka Beach). The rest of the time was just me with my thoughts, for days on end. Some of those have seeped out in this blog. My mind often wandered into strange and existential places and unexpected emotions. I cried frequently. It was a cathartic experience.

Lastly, and very importantly, the brief interactions with others along the way. Because these were so infrequent, they were all the more meaningful. And I was constantly struck by the unexpected kindness of strangers - whether wrapping a present for me on Christmas Eve, offering me dinner or a beer, or just sitting together and talking for a while. Thank you so much, to you all.

So - perhaps not quite joy, as such. But certainly, fulfilment. 

Paul also asked - what about the future? Will I continue with the Te Araroa? It’s another good question that I’ve been thinking about. My goal was to hike from Cape Reinga to Auckland - so in my mind, this journey had a clear end, and I’ve reached it. I don’t feel that there is unfinished business, that I need to continue on to Bluff to complete the whole TA. 

Yet... I’m aware that maybe some day, I might want a new adventure. And I know there are plenty more opportunities down the Te Araroa trail, waiting for me if I want them. So, this particular adventure is over. But maybe it’s not goodbye to the TA. Perhaps one day we’ll meet again. 

January 13, 2021